Like us on Facebook


Follow us on Twitter





Page 2 of 51 FirstFirst 123412 ... LastLast
Results 16 to 30 of 761
  1. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    Annapolis MD
    Posts
    16,271
    From your initial posts, I see two problems:

    1.) You are already at odds with yourself over something, your personal appearance specifically

    2.) You just met this girl and are asking her for your number.

    For the first, do something about your appearance. Highlight something that is good so it sticks out. Not everyone is a 10, most of us are far from it, but we highlight something or consistently do something different. Get a new haircut. Change your wardrobe (if you aren't comfortable with that, there are subscription websites that you can send pictures of yourself and your sizes, and they will put together clothes for you.) Start working out some. The list of self-improvement can go on and on and on.

    As far as the second, someone alluded to you just meeting this girl and asking for her number, and sometimes that creeps people out. There is a time and a place for that, like if you met someone out at a game or an event, but you're new neighbors. Giving out your number at that time probably turned her off initially. There was plenty of time to get to know her just being neighbors instead of getting her number. We are at this point regardless, so my suggestion to you is that you've been honest with her to this point about your personal life and why you can't hang out, and you are questioning her. So give her some space and see if she contacts you. You've done the heavy lifting to this point, now let her validate where this goes.

    Also, not all relationships with girls have to be based off love/sex. I used to view them as such, but life became much more healthy for me when I finally realized what I was doing. I have a great group of female friends right now, which I wouldn't have had six years ago, because that was the value I was putting on those relationships. Female friends can also be better wingmen than any male friends you have.

    In the end, looking back on some relationships, there may have been some romantic interests on their part, but you have to let them play out and don't have any expectations for any kind of interaction beyond showing your best self and having a good time.

  2. #17
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Rogers Centre
    Posts
    20,243
    Quote Originally Posted by Driven View Post
    I don't know if I agree with this. To me, why wait? I personally wouldn't really care if a neighbor and I are awkward. I'd rather save myself the emotional stress and just go for it and if she rejects me she rejects me. At least you'd know. I also think that if he has trouble befriending women that it's a good experience even if he is rejected. You're not going to get anywhere with women going forward until you put yourself out there and can suck up the losses.

    I agree with your advice that not all interactions have sexual undertones, but if that's what he wants, what would the benefit of becoming just friends with her be? I agree that she's probably just being friendly, but again, what is the real benefit of not finding out for sure if he wants to know more?
    Agree with the bolded. If this were someone he met at a bar or something like that then I'd be all for it. Just the fact that they're neighbours changes that. I also get the vibe that she's already uncomfortable from his previous and quick advances in getting her number. To me, having to ask for a number 3 times and then getting a couple "I'm busy" responses already tells us that she's not interested. That's why I'm saying to give it some time and try to re-approach the situation in a friendly manner much like his neighbour originally was.
    Quote Originally Posted by ChongInc. View Post
    Facts can be hypothetical.

  3. #18
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    N/A
    Posts
    72,796
    Women are impossible to understand and you will never will. They are alien-like creatures with an entirely different brain structure. They exist to confuse men. All of them are exactly the same, like this girl. Give up now. It's impossible.

    May I ask, how old are you?

    R. Johnson feels pretty spot on here. The gesture to invite your neighbor over to, as you said, introduce herself, is nice. But it's clear to me that that wasn't actually your mere intention. From what I gathered, it seems like she viewed it as just that and you didn't.

    If you like her there's nothing to be lost by telling her that. Rejection isn't a bad thing...it can help you move on. It'll save you all this time worrying about it. You say she seems to like you, but why? I see little indication. Maybe she does, but the easiest way to find out is to just swallow the awkwardness and your shyness and just ask.


    And it's possible to be friends with women The only reason it's not is if you're weird about it. You don't have to be weird about it. One of my best friends for 10+ years now is a woman my age. It's great.
    Hello there! Welcome to ManRam v8.00.
    Patch notes: This version is nice, funny, cool & goodô now

  4. #19
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by ThomasTomasz View Post
    From your initial posts, I see two problems:

    1.) You are already at odds with yourself over something, your personal appearance specifically

    2.) You just met this girl and are asking her for your number.

    For the first, do something about your appearance. Highlight something that is good so it sticks out. Not everyone is a 10, most of us are far from it, but we highlight something or consistently do something different. Get a new haircut. Change your wardrobe (if you aren't comfortable with that, there are subscription websites that you can send pictures of yourself and your sizes, and they will put together clothes for you.) Start working out some. The list of self-improvement can go on and on and on.

    As far as the second, someone alluded to you just meeting this girl and asking for her number, and sometimes that creeps people out. There is a time and a place for that, like if you met someone out at a game or an event, but you're new neighbors. Giving out your number at that time probably turned her off initially. There was plenty of time to get to know her just being neighbors instead of getting her number. We are at this point regardless, so my suggestion to you is that you've been honest with her to this point about your personal life and why you can't hang out, and you are questioning her. So give her some space and see if she contacts you. You've done the heavy lifting to this point, now let her validate where this goes.

    Also, not all relationships with girls have to be based off love/sex. I used to view them as such, but life became much more healthy for me when I finally realized what I was doing. I have a great group of female friends right now, which I wouldn't have had six years ago, because that was the value I was putting on those relationships. Female friends can also be better wingmen than any male friends you have.

    In the end, looking back on some relationships, there may have been some romantic interests on their part, but you have to let them play out and don't have any expectations for any kind of interaction beyond showing your best self and having a good time.
    I don't think it's my clothes I dress normally. But like I said she asked me to come across the street I should have just waived and closed the door. Which looking back I've should have done women are usually nothing but trouble anyway. From now on I'm just gonna try to ignore her and other women, after all, they either ignore me or act like I'm gonna do them favors well I'm not anyone's doormat. I'm so done being the nice guy women don't want nice they want the jerk types. Oh well, live and learn I guess.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  5. #20
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by ManRam View Post
    Women are impossible to understand and you will never will. They are alien-like creatures with an entirely different brain structure. They exist to confuse men. All of them are exactly the same, like this girl. Give up now. It's impossible.

    May I ask, how old are you?

    R. Johnson feels pretty spot on here. The gesture to invite your neighbor over to, as you said, introduce herself, is nice. But it's clear to me that that wasn't actually your mere intention. From what I gathered, it seems like she viewed it as just that and you didn't.

    If you like her there's nothing to be lost by telling her that. Rejection isn't a bad thing...it can help you move on. It'll save you all this time worrying about it. You say she seems to like you, but why? I see little indication. Maybe she does, but the easiest way to find out is to just swallow the awkwardness and your shyness and just ask.


    And it's possible to be friends with women The only reason it's not is if you're weird about it. You don't have to be weird about it. One of my best friends for 10+ years now is a woman my age. It's great.
    I'd rather not say my age. I just can't understand why she couldn't be upfront with me and just tell me look, I only like you as a friendly neighbor? I would have understood. If you saw what I looked like you'd understand why I made my move so quickly. It's no wonder so many men are going MGTOW. Women and girls can't be trusted. Not only that, but they have this ridiculous list of things the guy has to have in order for anyone can notice them. The funny thing is even the fattest and ugliest women think/believe they deserve Prince Charming but switched the gender with a man in the same situation with a Hot Blonde, for example, do you know what people would tell him? Go lose weight, and get plastic surgery.
    Last edited by BSF101; 06-04-2019 at 12:10 PM.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  6. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Rogers Centre
    Posts
    20,243
    Quote Originally Posted by BSF101 View Post
    I'm 33 she's 34. I just can't understand why she couldn't be upfront with me and just tell me look, I only like you as a friendly neighbor? I would have understood. If you saw what I looked like you'd understand why I made my move so quickly. It's no wonder so many men are going MGTOW. Women and girls can't be trusted. Not only that, but they have this ridiculous list of things the guy has to have in order for anyone can notice them.
    How can she be up front with you when she doesnít know you? She was being up front with you by inviting you over and introducing herself but then you went from 0-100 right away. No offence dude but you really need to take a step back here. Your neighbour is being nice to you and giving you the time of day. She doesnít owe you anything.

  7. #22
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Rochester, NY
    Posts
    45,142

    I donít understand women and Iíll probably never will.

    I think you need to stop stereotyping and blaming women and instead ask yourself what you can do to make yourself a better person and more appealing. The other option is to just give up on women and just accept it for what it is. Thereís nothing wrong with that unless you really do want a woman.

    If you want something in life, youíre going to have to make sacrifices and do things that are uncomfortable.

    From my experience women are more turned on by a mans attitude, appearance, persona, etc than their actual looks. Like Thomas square was saying, thereís a lot that you can do to make your appearance better. But I think you need to better yourself first and gain confidence.

    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    Last edited by Driven; 06-04-2019 at 12:13 PM.

  8. #23
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by R. Johnson#3 View Post
    How can she be up front with you when she doesnít know you? She was being up front with you by inviting you over and introducing herself but then you went from 0-100 right away. No offence dude but you really need to take a step back here. Your neighbour is being nice to you and giving you the time of day. She doesnít owe you anything.
    And I don't owe her or her mother anything either. Who the hell gave the mother the right to ask me to watch out for her deliveries? I wouldn't even ask my own family member to watch out for mail/packages

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  9. #24
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Rogers Centre
    Posts
    20,243
    Quote Originally Posted by BSF101 View Post
    I don't think it's my clothes I dress normally. But like I said she asked me to come across the street I should have just waived and closed the door. Which looking back I've should have done women are usually nothing but trouble anyway. From now on I'm just gonna try to ignore her and other women, after all, they either ignore me or act like I'm gonna do them favors well I'm not anyone's doormat. I'm so done being the nice guy women don't want nice they want the jerk types. Oh well, live and learn I guess.
    You see how youíre digging for sympathy here? Thatís probably one of the most unattractive traits in a man or woman. Watching for a package being delivered isnít a huge favour either. Thatís what neighbours do. The fact that youíre putting so much weight into such a minor thing tells me you expect someone to go above and beyond for you while you do next to nothing.

  10. #25
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by Driven View Post
    I think you need to stop stereotyping and blaming women and instead ask yourself what you can do to make yourself a better person and more appealing. The other option is to just give up on women and just accept it for what it is. Thereís nothing wrong with that unless you really do want a woman.

    If you want something in life, youíre going to have to make sacrifices and do things that are uncomfortable.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    The thing is I'm not stereotyping. I know for a fact if I was some 450lb women with warts on my face and smelled like rotten eggs I'd still somehow land a guy. Women can be shallow and superficial.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  11. #26
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Rogers Centre
    Posts
    20,243
    Quote Originally Posted by BSF101 View Post
    And I don't owe her or her mother anything either. Who the hell gave the mother the right to ask me to watch out for her deliveries? I wouldn't even ask my own family member to watch out for mail/packages
    Wow dude, she was just hoping youíd be a good neighbour. Your reaction to a simple favour being asked of you is very telling as to why youíre alone.

  12. #27
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by R. Johnson#3 View Post
    You see how youíre digging for sympathy here? Thatís probably one of the most unattractive traits in a man or woman. Watching for a package being delivered isnít a huge favour either. Thatís what neighbours do. The fact that youíre putting so much weight into such a minor thing tells me you expect someone to go above and beyond for you while you do next to nothing.
    I was upfront about my looks cause I know some would have been well he can't be that ugly. I've lived on this street for over 12+ yrs and I've never once asked anyone of my neighbors to hold or watch out for anything. These people have only been here for a month.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  13. #28
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by R. Johnson#3 View Post
    Wow dude, she was just hoping youíd be a good neighbour. Your reaction to a simple favour being asked of you is very telling as to why youíre alone.
    Well, I'm not gonna be someone's doormat or someone they can be nice too and take advantage of.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  14. #29
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by R. Johnson#3 View Post
    Alright dude, before I get into this I just want to say that Iím not making fun of you. Iím just putting things in a blunt manner.

    Not every encounter with a woman has romantic/sexual undertones. Remember that. Men and women can be friends. My best friend is a woman and weíve never had sex. Sheís incredibly attractive and there was tension between us when we first met but neither of us ever acted on it.

    This woman is your neighbour and from what I gathered she was just being a friendly neighbour. The fact that you were hesitant to say hello based on your looks shows that you already want to be more than neighbours. Cut that out. This is your neighbour and youíre probably going to run into her almost everyday. Itís much better to develop a friendship with someone like this than it would be to pursue romance/sex. If something goes wrong then you have to deal with the awkwardness of living across the street from her everyday.

    Asking your neighbour for her number right after meeting her is kind of weird. Let alone 3 times. She gave you her number on the 3rd try because you made it clear you werenít going to stop and she didnít want to enter an awkward situation with somebody who lives across the street from her. She isnít treating you like a doormat at all, sheís probably a little weirded out to be honest. If youíre constantly asking her out or asking to spend time with her a couple of minutes into the conversation then obviously she is going to keep on saying maybe later. She isnít going to flat out reject you due to the fact that you live across the street and things would get weird.

    The bit about her mom asking you to keep an eye out for the package is weird. You agreeing to do that will in no way help you get with her daughter. She was simply hoping for you to be a good neighbour.

    Hereís my advice. Stop calling, texting or whatever youíre doing for a while. If you see her outside just a simple, ďHey, hows your day goingĒ should work. To me it doesnít sound like sheís leading you on at all but is more so trying to protect herself from a potentially awkward situation. Give it a few weeks before you ask her to go on a walk or whatever and then when you do, donít approach it as a potential romantic conquest. Approach it as you hanging out with your neighbour because thatís what it is. It sounds like you need to learn to befriend women and not just make them your significant other.
    I think next time I'm just gonna ignore her.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

  15. #30
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    11,834
    Quote Originally Posted by Driven View Post
    I don't know if I agree with this. To me, why wait? I personally wouldn't really care if a neighbor and I are awkward. I'd rather save myself the emotional stress and just go for it and if she rejects me she rejects me. At least you'd know. I also think that if he has trouble befriending women that it's a good experience even if he is rejected. You're not going to get anywhere with women going forward until you put yourself out there and can suck up the losses.

    I agree with your advice that not all interactions have sexual undertones, but if that's what he wants, what would the benefit of becoming just friends with her be? I agree that she's probably just being friendly, but again, what is the real benefit of not finding out for sure if he wants to know more?
    Quote Originally Posted by Driven View Post
    This is how I feel. If he doesn't make a move he's not going to make a move the next time or the time after that.

    I would rather just know. You have to have thick skin and suck it up if she rejects you, but it'll save you stress going forward and will better prepare you for the next opportunity.
    I'm not even gonna bother wasting my time with this woman anymore.

    Coming soon to a WWE Ring near you!

Page 2 of 51 FirstFirst 123412 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •