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View Poll Results: What would YOU do for a Klondike bar?

Voters
6. You may not vote on this poll
  • Purchase one.

    5 83.33%
  • I don't much care for them.

    1 16.67%
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Results 1 to 15 of 186
  1. #1
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    Chicago Cubs vs. Atlanta Braves, May 9-11

    Baseball is many things. It is a sport. Extrapolating further, it is a "bat and ball" sport, of which there are many other examples such as cricket and meteorite smacking. For those unfamiliar with the latter it is a personal favorite of mine, wherein one positions himself in a field or other open space of few obstructions and simply waits for a space rock to fall within the range of his swing. It takes an almost abnormal level of dedication, but the sense of accomplishment one attains upon finally managing to cream one of the little extraterrestrial buggers is beyond compare. Of course, this is a much more popular sport here, on the moon, where there is no pesky atmosphere to burn up any swattable interplanetary projectiles, so I guess you ****ers are just **** out of luck.

    But anyway, back to baseball.

    Like all competitions baseball is more enjoyable when you, or the players you live vicariously through, are successful. There has not been a whole lot of success for the Chicago National League Ball Club in 2014. After winning their first series by taking two out of three from the much loathed St. Louis Cardinals they promptly dropped three out of four to the cross-town Chicago White Sox, including both games at their home venue of Wrigley Field. But is there a glimmer of hope? For the Cubs did win the final game of that series behind a spectacular power display of their young players in Rizzo, Castro and Olt. So they may very well be flying into Atlanta on a relative high, primed and eager to continue that success against the 18-15 Braves.

    Shall the Chicago Cubs find victory in Georgia? Or will they be rendered unconscious by an angry hale of slobbery peach pits? FIND OUT ON THE NEXT EXCITING EPISODE OF ah **** it, here's your match-ups:


    From Turner Field

    Friday, May 9th, 6:35

    /\/\/\
    Jason Hammel vs. Julio Teheren
    (4-1, 2.43)-----(2-2, 1.80)
    CSN


    Saturday, May 10th, 6:10

    /\/\/\
    Jeff Samardzija vs. Ervin Santana
    (0-3, 1.62)-----(3-0, 2.41)
    WGN


    Sunday, May 11th, 12:35

    /\/\/\
    Edwin Jackson vs. Alex Wood
    (2-2, 4.57)-----(2-5, 3.00)
    WGN, MLBN




    OFFENSIVE LEADERS:


    OPS


    Braves: Justin Upton (.974), Freddie Freeman (.910), Evan Gattis (.789)
    Cubs: Anthony Rizzo (.926), Starlin Castro (.761), Welington Castillo (.748)

    HRs

    Braves: Upton (9), Gattis (7), Freeman (6)
    Cubs: Rizzo (7), Olt (6), Castro (5)

    LILN

    Braves: Pastornicky (11), Carpenter (9), Schlosser (9)
    Cubs: Schierholtz (11), Samardzija (10), Villanueva (10)
    Last edited by Unexplained; 05-09-2014 at 11:09 AM.

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  2. #2
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    Give me a HEATH Klondike Bar or some other variation of the original and I'm cool.
    5/1/15


  3. #3
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    Hopefully the Braves get to see a good showing of Shark on Saturday, in case they need the SP help later in the season.
    5/1/15


  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmmahhh View Post
    Hopefully the Braves get to see a good showing of Shark on Saturday, in case they need the SP help later in the season.
    Hell if the Cubs don't get him a win tomorrow Smurdj might refuse to leave.

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unexplained View Post
    Hell if the Cubs don't get him a win tomorrow Smurdj might refuse to leave.
    Combined Ted Lilly and Jeff Samardzija killing spree in Atlanta???

    Atlantic Ocean is right there to deposit the evidence.
    5/1/15


  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmmahhh View Post
    Combined Ted Lilly and Jeff Samardzija killing spree in Atlanta???

    Atlantic Ocean is right there to deposit the evidence.
    Atlanta is in Northern Georgia, so it's a fair distance to both the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico.

    And no.

    Ted Lilly works alone.

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unexplained View Post
    Atlanta is in Northern Georgia, so it's a fair distance to both the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico.

    And no.

    Ted Lilly works alone.
    Yeah you're probably right.

    The "killing spree" stuff would probably lower Shark's trade value too.
    5/1/15


  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmmahhh View Post
    Yeah you're probably right.

    The "killing spree" stuff would probably lower Shark's trade value too.
    He should kill them at the beach. Then the headline will be "Shark Kills Fifteen at Georgia Beach" and everybody will assume it was an actual shark.

    It's the perfect crime.

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unexplained View Post
    He should kill them at the beach. Then the headline will be "Shark Kills Fifteen at Georgia Beach" and everybody will assume it was an actual shark.

    It's the perfect crime.
    Landshark:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swsEvb2yytU

    Don't trust those mother****ers!

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unexplained View Post
    He should kill them at the beach. Then the headline will be "Shark Kills Fifteen at Georgia Beach" and everybody will assume it was an actual shark.

    It's the perfect crime.
    Now you've got something there.
    5/1/15


  11. #11
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    Listen: sweep.

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  12. #12
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    I'd like to take time out of my schedule to thank Ryan Dempster for taking his time in deciding if he wanted to go to the braves. In doing so he allowed us to get the pitcher we know as Hendricks instead of the long relief pitcher known as Delgado. Along wit KH we were also able to get another youthful 3rd basemen that might be a pretty good ball player. When we first discussed this I said we got a better deal than Dempster would have not needed more time to decide. I am a fortune teller and this is another Cubs Den exclusive.
    BUTTERFLIES AND RAINBOWS!!!!! JP611 Just called me an ecstasy user!!!! WTF!!!

    Welcome Tyler Kolek or Brady Aiken or Carlos Rodon if not one of them say hello To Alex Jackson.

  13. #13
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    I'd like to take time out of my schedule to thank Ryan Dempster for taking his time in deciding if he wanted to go to the braves. In doing so he allowed us to get the pitcher we know as Hendricks instead of the long relief pitcher known as Delgado. Along wit KH we were also able to get another youthful 3rd basemen that might be a pretty good ball player. When we first discussed this I said we got a better deal than Dempster would have not needed more time to decide. I am a fortune teller and this is another Cubs Den exclusive.
    BUTTERFLIES AND RAINBOWS!!!!! JP611 Just called me an ecstasy user!!!! WTF!!!

    Welcome Tyler Kolek or Brady Aiken or Carlos Rodon if not one of them say hello To Alex Jackson.

  14. #14
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    Was that supposed to be a pitch out or was that a lucky wild pitch?
    All animals are created equal, but some animals are more equal than others.

  15. #15
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    Bang bang says olt
    BUTTERFLIES AND RAINBOWS!!!!! JP611 Just called me an ecstasy user!!!! WTF!!!

    Welcome Tyler Kolek or Brady Aiken or Carlos Rodon if not one of them say hello To Alex Jackson.

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