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  1. #1
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    Cubs @ Cardinals (4/11 - 4/13)




    Chicago Bears #23
    Kyle "Cheetah" Fuller

  2. #2
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    Apr 2006
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    First

  3. #3
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    Nov 2005
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    Milwaukee
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    Last

  4. #4
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    Looks like more searching for bright spots and moral victories

  5. #5
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    Jun 2007
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    Chicago
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    Sweep

  6. #6
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    Jan 2007
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    Missouri
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    Winning would sure be neat-o!

  7. #7
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    Silver Lining: 3-6 with 4 one run losses (to a pretty good team)

    ****** pessimism: Going to 3-9 would blow.
    Thanks JO-MO

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    Moon Trailer, Mare Crisium
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    The onset of spring brings us baseball, rain, and annoying joggers with earbuds pumping ****** music directly into their brains who you could totally plow over and they wouldn't even hear it coming. But it also brings out the birds. Wherein the icy morass of winter only the crows stuck about, filling the stark air with their unsavory cries, now the songbirds come, venturing northward from southern climes to sing sweet melodies and flutter about our bird feeders and poop all over everything which provides even the most humble of perches. And that's why it's important to have a BB gun. Sure, you could use a real gun, but that A) seems like overkill, B) ammo is quite a bit more expensive and C) frequent firings of it probably won't go over too well with the neighborhood association. So leave your second amendment rights to things like protecting your life, family and property and purchase yourself a 20 buck Pumpmaster at your local Walmart for the real important things: endeadening those poofy, ****-showering, singing loudly at 6:30 AM, brightly colored little ****ers. As a bonus: a BB gun is also good for gophers. Now it won't kill them, and they won't explode in a heart-warming puff of billowy feathers, but it will put a little fear of man into them, and that does wonders. But back to the birds: I've even formulated a nice little scoring system for you, as you sit on the back porch this friday evening, drinking your alcoholic beverage of choice and seething in hatred for those bloviating avian fiends hopping and flitting about all happy-like:

    1 point for a finch
    2 points for a robin
    3 points for a sparrow
    4 points for a blue bird
    5 points for a starling
    10 points for a hummingbird
    20 points for a bat (mammal, bird, whatever. It flies, it *****, destroy it.)
    And 50 points for a Cardinal, because **** St. Louis.

    Go Cubs

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  9. #9
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    Holy ****. No Cubs minors games till night. No Cubs games till night. No other MLB games till night. They're trying to make this the longest friday ever, aren't they? (and by they I mean baseballuminati.)

    Tearing down Utopia, one brick at a time.

  10. #10
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    Oct 2005
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    Puerto Rico
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    Matchups don't look good at all for saturday and sunday. Samardzjia probably will be taken out with a league tonight and since Schlitter blew it yesterday i guess is Wright's turn to do the same tonight.

  11. #11
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    Nov 2005
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    I think this series the Cubs starters get rocked early and often. The pen comes in each night and is lights out after it ceases to matter. Gotta spread around the suckage.

  12. #12
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unexplained View Post
    The onset of spring brings us baseball, rain, and annoying joggers with earbuds pumping ****** music directly into their brains who you could totally plow over and they wouldn't even hear it coming. But it also brings out the birds. Wherein the icy morass of winter only the crows stuck about, filling the stark air with their unsavory cries, now the songbirds come, venturing northward from southern climes to sing sweet melodies and flutter about our bird feeders and poop all over everything which provides even the most humble of perches. And that's why it's important to have a BB gun. Sure, you could use a real gun, but that A) seems like overkill, B) ammo is quite a bit more expensive and C) frequent firings of it probably won't go over too well with the neighborhood association. So leave your second amendment rights to things like protecting your life, family and property and purchase yourself a 20 buck Pumpmaster at your local Walmart for the real important things: endeadening those poofy, ****-showering, singing loudly at 6:30 AM, brightly colored little ****ers. As a bonus: a BB gun is also good for gophers. Now it won't kill them, and they won't explode in a heart-warming puff of billowy feathers, but it will put a little fear of man into them, and that does wonders. But back to the birds: I've even formulated a nice little scoring system for you, as you sit on the back porch this friday evening, drinking your alcoholic beverage of choice and seething in hatred for those bloviating avian fiends hopping and flitting about all happy-like:

    1 point for a finch
    2 points for a robin
    3 points for a sparrow
    4 points for a blue bird
    5 points for a starling
    10 points for a hummingbird
    20 points for a bat (mammal, bird, whatever. It flies, it *****, destroy it.)
    And 50 points for a Cardinal, because **** St. Louis.

    Go Cubs
    Well done, Unexplained.

    I would like to point out however:

    It is illegal to take, kill, or possess Northern Cardinals, and violation of the law is punishable by a fine of up to US $15,000 and imprisonment of up to six months.
    5/1/15


  13. #13
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    Chicago
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    Laziest igts ever

  14. #14
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    Nov 2005
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    Get a brain morons! guy has a twitter feed! Omg this is gold Jerry! Gold I tell you!

    First, an interview with the so-called best of the best fans in baseball here:

    http://www.baseballnation.com/2011/7...a-brain-morans

    Some gems:

    Q: As I'm sure you know, the photograph of you at the‒

    A: ‒I can't talk about that. I'm in the process of suing that photographer and a bunch of internet people, if I can find a lawyer who'll represent me. [To tape recorder] If anyone listening to this is a lawyer or an attorney, please contact my twitter so I can sue somebody.

    Q: What is a "True Cardinal"?

    A: A "True Cardinal" does not coast on his natural ability. In fact, I don't want anyone with any kind of natural ability wearing the "birds on bats." I would sooner take someone that drives a Ford F-150, speaks clearly, and runs out every grounder over any so called "five-tool player." The only tool I care about is Tulowitzki, who I think has the potential to be a "True Cardinal." And I've tried to tell that to Mr. Jocketty, but I can't find his email address on the Cardinals website.
    Then on to the live twitter feed!

    https://twitter.com/birdsonbats06

    With insightful and intelligent commentary such as:

    BFIB ‏@BirdsOnBats06 Apr 3
    My other fav team is the #yankees. You ****'s can get back to me when you got 38 rings! #blessed #STLCARDS #dynasty's
    BFIB ‏@BirdsOnBats06 Mar 7
    A glorious day of witness. If you don't go too Christian Day at Bush this year your *** #STLCARDS #blessed #Him pic.twitter.com/cdv2BCUrwi
    Lots of really offensive stuff there not appropriate for PSD. Well worth a little time killing before the series starts up tonight. The best fans in baseball will be out in force!

    Last edited by NYF; 04-11-2014 at 03:22 PM.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by NYF View Post
    Get a brain morons! guy has a twitter feed! Omg this is gold Jerry! Gold I tell you!

    First, an interview with the so-called best of the best fans in baseball here:

    http://www.baseballnation.com/2011/7...a-brain-morans

    Some gems:





    Then on to the live twitter feed!

    https://twitter.com/birdsonbats06

    With insightful and intelligent commentary such as:





    Lots of really offensive stuff there not appropriate for PSD. Well worth a little time killing before the series starts up tonight. The best fans in baseball will be out in force!

    Is that the guy who had the crazy and hilarious youtube channel? Nevermind, different guy, equally awesome:

    You can follow a team that has what I call "a winning mentality," with players who play the game the right way and speak our official language, or you can follow those loser franchises that don't do "the little things." That's something I came up with a while back, "the little things." It's the little things that win championships.
    You heard him, he came up with "the little things" totally never been said before that!
    Last edited by Doogolas; 04-11-2014 at 03:28 PM.

    And then. He made them pancakes.

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