Michael Beasley partied, smoked weed, got arrested and was later cut by the Phoenix Suns. He did just about everything wrong – or did he?
First he makes nearly $9 million in his first two seasons as a man in his early 20s living on South Beach.
He then earned $23,974,587 in the last three seasons helping his mediocre teams to 57 wins. That's about $420,000 (get it?) a win.
His biggest paycheck yet was when the Phoenix Suns paid him $7 million to simply go away. I wish I could get one-hundredth of 1 percent that much to be told to **** off.
After all that, he's likely headed toward his first championship by the age of 25 with a star-studded Miami Heat that features seven players picked sixth or higher in the NBA draft.
Sure; he offered the Heat a non-guaranteed contract of $1 million for the right, but what is that to a guy who just got paid nearly $24 million for a few years of partying? That's not including the nearly $9 million he's already made off of Miami in exchange for 87 wins.
Now he gets to learn from the best basketball player on the planet, in addition to another great power forward. And if either one of them leaves, and Beasley's at all playing well, he'll probably start getting fat paychecks again to live on South Beach.
Like Sean May's ill-fitting t-shirt says, even when Beasley's failing urinalyses, he "pisses excellence."