Like us on Facebook


Follow us on Twitter





Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 56
  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    8,572
    vCash
    1000

    Grossest thing you've ever smelled.

    Today I woke up, did my morning routine, I had just come into my apartment from starting my car in this frigid weather. Recently I noticed a stench in my kitchen. Well this morning that stench was found in the form of a bag of potatoes. A like 4 month old bag of potatoes, sitting on top of my fridge in a corner, potatoes I didn't know existed.
    These slimey, disgusting, and dripping potatoes were the worst thing ever. I gagged at first scent. It wasn't until the rogue drip on my sleeve stench made throw up in my bathroom.
    I spent a solid 30 minutes cleaning it up, still wreaks.

    Close second is the summer we had a billion caterpillars on our house die at once and get baked in the sun. I didn't throw up then though.
    How do you say magic in Russian?



    Don't forget about the Gustav


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Deutschland
    Posts
    15,962
    vCash
    1500
    Here's one:

    If you have a weak stomach, leave now.

    George regularly cleans the windows at KFC. For those of you from parts of the world where there is no KFC, it stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken and it's a fast-food restaurant that serves... well... fried chicken.

    Interesting aside: KFC is the most popular Western fast-food chain in the People's Republic of China. Also KFC is so prevalent in Japan that many Japanese unknowingly consider it to be a Japanese Company. Most KFC stores located in predominantly Islamic countries prepare foods in accordance with halal guidelines. So it's not just a North American thing, it's international.

    Oh yeah, apparently KFC products are the most popularly requested items for death row inmates' final meals.

    Wow.

    So usually George cleans the KFC's in our area on Monday. But sometimes, due to holidays or exceptionally bad weather, the schedule gets changed. That's usually when I get called in to get things back on schedule. So one day he sent me to clean the windows both inside and outside of a KFC... on degreasing day.

    I rang the bell and the manager let me in. (It's much easier to clean a restaurant before there are any customers inside.) As I went in, I couldn't help but notice the giant noisy tanker truck with the hoses, sitting behind the restaurant. The nice manager lady explained to me that it was degreasing day. She explained that they basically vacuum out the scum and grease that collect in the bottom of the chicken frier's. Apparently this has to be done regularly or the stuff will rot and then the chicken will get contaminated. Oh boy.

    She was very serious and insisted that I listen carefully. So I listened, wondering what any of this had to do with me. I was just there to clean the windows. She explained to me that most people cannot stand to be inside during degreasing because the smell makes them sick. I laughed. She shook her head. She explained that it was not a laughing matter. Some employees actually throw up uncontrollably the first time they are present for a degreasing.

    Wow.

    I said I'd go outside if it got too bad and went ahead and started cleaning. The degreaser guys started up their equipment and the air began to fill with rotting fried chicken and grease particulate. I calmly cleaned away, and when the smell hit me I thought "OH MY GOD!"... but I didn't barf. I was proud of myself. I kept cleaning.

    The initial smell was a rose bouquet compared to the colossal stench when they exposed the lower, more rotten layers of filth. If death wore the worst cologne ever imagined and walked through a palliative care ward while vomiting and defecating, the odour would be a sad, pale imitation of the vile, putrid, festering unholiness that came out of those frier's.

    It got so bad I started to black out. I had to run outside and put my head between my knees. Even outside the smell was horrific.

    After that, I couldn't eat KFC for more than a year.

    Now, I laugh at horrible smells. When others turn green I smile and take a long deep breath. I survived degreasing day. Everything else is a walk past the Macy's perfume counter.

    BY T. D. FUHRINGER

    Now that you've read this story, I beg of all of you to even attempt to describe a more putrid, mortifying smell than that.

    And by the way, those pants, they belong to my dad.And they're not really pants,
    they're Lederhosen



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Toronto
    Posts
    21,525
    vCash
    1500
    My grandma's vagina.

    S E A N....M A Y N E

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    35,319
    vCash
    500
    Yeah, grease traps are nasty.

    This lotion my friend wears is pretty vomitastic. Had I ever been attracted to her, that'd be a 100% no-go.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    5,819
    vCash
    1500
    High water on a river trapped several thousand smelt (small fish sort of like sardines) in a bunch of natural rock pools outside my buddy's house. The water receded and the fish were left in pools that then dried up. The smell of several thousand oily, rank, rotting fish wafted across the landscape, and was almost unbearable. I was holding it together until his dog ran over and ate some. The smell was like a solid thing, hitting me in the brain. Just nasty.
    "The idea that the market will solve such things as environmental concerns, as our racial divides, as our class distinctions, our problems with educating and incorporating one generation of workers into the economy after the other when that economy is changing; the idea that the market is going to heed all of the human concerns and still maximise profit is juvenile. . . Are we all in this together or are we all not?" - David Simon, creator of The Wire

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    52,054
    vCash
    1500
    dead rotting fish
    30 Team Stadium Checklist: 11 to go

    1) Yankees 2) Orioles 3) Rays 4) Red Sox 5) Mets 6) Braves 7) Phillies 8) Nationals 9) Marlins 10) Pirates 11) Padres 12) Astros 13) Mariners 14) Twins 15) Cubs 16) White Sox 17) Cardinals 18) Indians 19) Tigers 20) Royals (May 2014)


  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    H-Town/The Burgh
    Posts
    13,075
    vCash
    1500
    Quote Originally Posted by greg_ory_2005 View Post
    My grandma's vagina.
    Quote Originally Posted by Labgrownmangoat View Post
    High water on a river trapped several thousand smelt (small fish sort of like sardines) in a bunch of natural rock pools outside my buddy's house. The water receded and the fish were left in pools that then dried up. The smell of several thousand oily, rank, rotting fish wafted across the landscape, and was almost unbearable. I was holding it together until his dog ran over and ate some. The smell was like a solid thing, hitting me in the brain. Just nasty.
    Quote Originally Posted by Pinstripe power View Post
    dead rotting fish
    All the same thing...

    Big THX to MJ's Bulls and pheagles10 on the sig help!
    Dear T-Mac,
    I miss you.
    Love,
    The Rim

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Deutschland
    Posts
    15,962
    vCash
    1500
    Quote Originally Posted by sep11ie View Post
    All the same thing...
    That was mean; some grandmas can be in their 30s

    And by the way, those pants, they belong to my dad.And they're not really pants,
    they're Lederhosen



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    H-Town/The Burgh
    Posts
    13,075
    vCash
    1500
    Quote Originally Posted by Johann View Post
    That was mean; some grandmas can be in their 30s
    My grandma is only 27.

    Big THX to MJ's Bulls and pheagles10 on the sig help!
    Dear T-Mac,
    I miss you.
    Love,
    The Rim

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Bay Area
    Posts
    22,140
    vCash
    500
    This place in India which I think is a tannery. The building always had dead animal bodies around it lying in the sun. I remember we had to drive by it because it was right next to the national highway. The smell made me vomit couple of times.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    19,783
    vCash
    1500
    Quote Originally Posted by sep11ie View Post
    My grandma is only 27.
    That's impressive.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    From Way Downtown
    Posts
    9,462
    vCash
    1500
    ****





    Grizz: 47-32 Titans: 7-9 UK BBall: 29-11 APSU BBall: 12-18
    - MJ-BULLS

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Alex Smith's Dick
    Posts
    3,384
    vCash
    500
    Quote Originally Posted by greg_ory_2005 View Post
    My grandma's vagina.
    I was gonna say this but replace grandma's with wife's


    Go Braves/49ers!

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    14,692
    vCash
    1500
    I had a pilonidal cyst that got lanced. Nearly vomited once the smell hit me.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Sacramento, CA
    Posts
    4,200
    vCash
    1500
    cadavers in anatomy class.

    smells awful. Coupled with a ton of organs, tissue, and limbs in concealed buckets.

Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •